Past Wonderments

Seeping to the surface

The past catches up

Lingering in the background of the present

The impact and depth of the past

Wonderments

The powerful way

Molds my life, who I am, my actions

Strongly, profoundly

Shockwave of revelation

That what I do

What I say, pursue

Choose

It will and has and always will

Impact me in unchangeable

Unnoticeable, un-recognizable ways

Until unabashedly observe my motives

Reasons, logic, and emotions

Hugely grasp that running from the past

Shutting it out

Not so easy said as done

The past is a part of who I am

These experiences shape

And continue to shape

Divert me in many different ways

Wonderments of what could have been

The have not-s and what not-s

Scared and fearful

I cannot take back what has been

Then I remember what is

It is what it is

Maybe everything does happen for a reason

Maybe this is a way of learning

A way of perceiving and sensing time and change

Maybe that things are not always as they seem

Which is why the future has so much to look forward to

Why the present is a gift for taking action

A gift of feeling and thinking

A gift of awareness of the choices I make

Of who I am, who I ought to be, and who I can become

By: Amara Van Orden