Resistance to the Heeding

Resistance to the heeding
Only seems to drag me into
Heart wrenching lovely possibilities and memories
My heart sinking down
It sags with dread
I smell trouble and toil
The track my heart takes me
Yet it yells suck it up!
Get out of your comfort zone!
You must never give up
Never give up on love!
Such lovely misleading thoughts can leave a heart barren
And regretful

Overcome with fear
Recalling the stupidity and foolishness
The sleepless nights
The neediness to see the lovely person
The one that overtakes the heart
Possesses the thoughts
Sinking down even more into dread

The more I deny
The more my heart seems tug at its strings
The more agitated I become
Putting the frantic energy on supposed distractions
A pointless cure, except this energy does get things done

A hesitant, broken, or cold heart
Literally feels physical pain
When it begins to heal its cracks
The mind’s hesitation
The heart’s yearning
Conflicting, creates what is known as heartache

Confused and belittled
By the war between logic and emotion
What is one to do?
But naturally resist
It is so hard sometimes
To forget it
To not hope and try
To not desire it
In the end, will it be that same old love lesson?

And the neutral part of this war has to always remind me
The no man’s land, the spiritual part
The importance and great worthiness in the pursuit of love
Breathe in and out
Be still my achy hart
Be still my chaotic mind
The outcome does not matter
But the journey

By: Amara Van Orden

" [The lord] He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds." - Psalms 147:3

“But the healing of a wound is an art not acquired by practice alone, but by the loving tenderness that comes from universal good will and a sympathetic interest in the welfare and happiness of others.” - Joseph F. Smith Gospel Doctrine, 5th ed. (1939), 264.