I Am Stronger On My Own

I am stronger on my own
Yet still incomplete
I am stronger without you
Because my knees wobble
When you’re around
My heart skips a beat
Breath taken
Speechlessness
But you don’t catch my breath
So…
When I am with the ones
Whose knees I make wobble
I feel so adored, powerful
But I know it is wrong and leading on
So, I let them go
Because my breath is perfectly intact with them
My skin doesn’t tingle
My chest isn’t full of that overwhelming warmth
I have not yet met someone
Strong enough to be with me
I have not yet met someone
I can be strong enough with
And I am at that experimental age
And these are supposed to be my
Peak athletic years
So I am single, single
Because they say
I would do so much more
I would see so much more
And these are the times
When everyone thinks
You should have everything you need
Be everything
Before you fall in love or settle
Yet I know better
Falling in love is never convenient
It is never planned
Plus who wants to be with someone who is perfect?
Who has reached their potential before your own?
And I am at that age
Where I question everything
When liberal thinkers
Make up the plethora of my education
My entertainment
I will admit
I like being able to do whatever I want
I like just being me
An individual of freedom
No one critical of my actions
Of my habits
But shouldn’t the one you love
Let you be an individual
Because that is what makes
Any relationship interesting, complementary
I really do value my independence
My alone time
But at the end of the day
It is the people in my life that matter the most
Because if there is one thing
I am doing at least right in my life
The most worthwhile valuable aspects of my life
It is the love I learn from others
It is the love I am giving
By: Amara Van Orden

The Go-Get-Her

Go-------------getter
R e s t l e s s e n e r g y
Hiiigggghhhlllly motiiiiivvvvated
100% Max-i-mum
Half-hearted
Half-done
Just not ME
Work HARD
!!!Do It!!!
Think hard, live hard
Because I thrive on challenge
Busy schedule, late nights
Go, go, til’ I drop
So much to see
So much to do
So little time
Sometimes I wonder if I will ever stop
But I am fully alive
So alive
I dance, I sing, I run
I climb over hills, rocks, and valleys
I explore and absorb the scenery
Capture the moment
Breathe the moment
Because life is invigorating
Life can be so sweet
So I give my all
Live to my best
So I can be my best
Reach my full potential
So much to learn
So much to experience
I sweat it out
Work it out
Try hard
Stepping out the box
Creativity is about breaching the boundaries
Going beyond that same old routine
Always exploring
Always observing
Variety is the spice of life
I thrive on diversity
Open my mind
Open my heart
Because the universe responds
To that which has room, makes room
And gives and gives
My heart is full
Always willing to love
I am learning to overcome its limitations
Its boundaries
Hence go get what you want
And it may change and fluctuate
But that’s the beauty of pursuing what you want
Setting goals
Accomplishing steps
Conquering the spontaneity
And the unexpected
Only to take advantage of life’s curve balls
You discover yourself
Discover life
Your wants and needs
Become more and more clearer with time
The unnecessary and destructive
Becomes more easily overcome
And done in the past
Where it should stay
Blurred, while I move onward
Bye…. Bye…. the holder downers and dream crushers!
So go get it!
Because I am up-mostly motivated
Happiest
When I work hard for what I want
What I need
For my dreams
Failure comes
But it only makes one stronger
More resourceful and creative
I am a go-getter
I am not ashamed of it
Because life has so much to offer
By: Amara Van Orden

Satisfaction does not come with achievement, but with effort. Full effort is full victory. -Mahatma Gandhi

Achievement seems to be connected with action. Successful men and women keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit. -Conrad Hilton

You are not here merely to make a living. You are here in order to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world, and you impoverish yourself if you forget the errand. -Woodrow Wilson

Laundering of the Mind

The girl who couldn’t sleep
Instead doing some laundry
Grab a bag of Doritos
Midnight snack
Carbs make me sleepy
Awaiting the end of the spin cycle
Stretch my tan legs across the dryer and washer
Lean against the wall
Such a different perspective at this height
Sitting, contemplating
Look up
I see cracks in the ceiling
Make a mental note to mention it
This moment strangely peaceful
Uplifting
A moment to myself
Thinking in wonderments
The lullaby of the spinning
A hypnotic focus
Discovering more about myself
Sometimes I feel un-malleable
Like the same old “me”
But sometimes I can even be a mystery to myself
Amazed by these simple moments
The way it brings me back to my center
My motives, thoughts, feelings better understood
Just sitting on the washer and dryer
Eating chips
Letting my eyes close
Drifting in meditation
Mechanical noises drone away
Into a oddly surprisingly enlightening moment
Initiated best by the simplest activities
The simplest moments
By: Amara Van Orden

Break It Up

You know I am going to…
Break the patterns
Breaking the habits
Change
Metamorphose
Because making the same mistakes twice
That’s just out of the equation
Because I am a mathematician
I can solve, dissolve
Divide, multiply
According to my will
According to my state of mind
Options, possibilities, pathways
That is my choice
They say the brain can change itself
Heal it self
Human resilience, adaptation
Unlike any natural phenomena
Happiness comes in milligrams
Takes an open mind, open heart
To take any environment, situation
Make the most of it
See its abundance, potential
I am not perfect
Far beyond that
But wisdom is power
Just like knowledge
So I soak it in
Learn from myself
From others mistakes
Because I don’t want to be stuck in a rut
So I am breaking the patterns
The habits
Only nourish the good ones
Resistance to the sinister heeding
Progression
Going, going
Onward on
Endurance
Because I am fully alive
And an uncannily self-aware being
I am here now
And it matters more what I do now
What I learn now
What I do to change and experience
Overcome the addictions
The weaknesses
It takes time
And a willpower strong and broad
But just like my body
Just like my intellect
I can exercise it
It can become stronger and wider
By: Amara Van Orden

Kinetic Movement

This is the moment
Where I take control
Clear my mind
Dissolve my worrisome thoughts
Getting out
Going up
Faces, Places, Friends
Flirt
Let my hair down
Dress to impress
To express me
Get comfortable
Because anyone can notice
A faker on the dance floor
Let loose
Joints to point
Let the bass move you
Massages through you
Higher with every throbbing beat
Jump out of your skin
Your mind
Expression tension
Feel the release
Boys and girls come together
Leaving behind drama at the door
Because tonight is the night
To forget
To let go
The human body was meant to move
To go, to flow
Don’t you feel that natural high
Satisfying the natural itch
To express, connect, to come closer
To become a part of reality and its matter
Kinetic movement
Body heat
Sweat, chemicals intermingle
Intoxicating
But no one cares as long as the music keeps going
As long as we all keep going
As long as the world is yours and mine to share
By: Amara Van Orden

Kinetic enegry - the energy of a body or a system with respect to the motion of the body or of the particles in the system. -dictionary.com

We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. -Japanese Proverb

Dancing is the poetry of the foot. -John Dryden

The dance is a poem of which each movement is a word. ~Mata Hari

Movement never lies. It is a barometer telling the state of the soul's weather to all who can read it. ~Martha Graham

Sweet Clarity

Window panes
Curtains
Wide open
Free flowing air
On a windless quiet sunny day
When one door closes
Another door opens
Or even windows
Impossible to possibility
Clarity passing over
Self-defeating
Assuming eyes
Seeing is believing
But seeing can also be deceiving
Intuition
Faith
Truth is much clearer
Stepping out of my shoes
Broadening horizons
The grander picture
It is becoming all so very clear
A moment in time
When peace, happiness, and fulfillment
Collide into one
One state of revelation
Like being on the dance floor
One with the music
The lights
The bass
It flows through the body and mind
Enigmatically moving one into a
State of freedom
State of empowerment
When you let your mind go
Your body flow
All under your control
Taking over space
Oh, sweet clarity
God has heard my prayers
And He has answered
I know, I think I really do know
Finally...
I was blind but now I see
It is so clear
So clear
What I want, what I need
I am ready to just be
See where the spontaneity
The variety
The endless opportunities
The spiritually fulfilling
Exciting moments
Savor this sweet clarity
And its easement and empowerment
Carry it with me
And just be
By: Amara Van Orden

The Supposed Feelings

Trying to find the words
Words to express
How I feel every time
You pass my mind
Unexpectedly pleasant wave of heat
When it is early and the floor is freezing
Shivers release into my body
When I recall your voice
A melodic song that seeps into my mind
Sedation, a lullaby that could put me asleep
How I feel every time I am around you
A thrill, a challenge
The courage to ride that rollercoaster
Or jump off a cliff into the water crashing
How I feel about your gaze
A book, inviting yet full of mystery
So many thoughts and possibilities lie ahead in that plot
You lure me in like wind chimes in the wind
You make feel like
I have been wrapped in a warm freshly dried blanket
I could lay asleep in it
Sinking down and down
So dreamy, a rejuvenating deep sleep
It is hard to wake up
If I do, I lazily lay about
Until the alarm clock beeps it ravenous sounds
I condemn my logic for awakening from the dream
But in the end it is a supposed feeling
This I have learned with any euphoric state-of-mind
It fades and can be thrown its harsh and sorrowful bones
Or perhaps a bone of independence
Or a bone of sensibility
Maybe the euphoria fades, but contentment can be found
But fear not, euphoria
It is meant to be a treasure
Cherished, a buffer for a forming bond
A reminder of the falling times spent together
Not a necessity or addiction
But a reflection of emotion, connection, of forming love

By: Amara Van Orden